Insert Nicaraguan anthem here

In order to get paid a salary by CO2 Bambu in Nicaragua, I need to be a resident. Months ago, I had a spurt of energy to set the wheels in motion to obtain residency. Not such an easy process as Nicaraguans love their paperwork.

First I needed an original birth certificate. In my case, that meant getting it in person in Paris, on my last trip there. I had tried getting a birth certificate by mail, to no avail. Then there was the Police Department certification that I am not a mass murderer. That was easy to get, but then the Police Certificate from Highland Park had to be notorized, then sent to the Nicaraguan Embassy in Washington. Got said certificate “authenticated”. I also needed a “good health” note from my doctor. That too had to be notorized and authenticated. Seems like no big deal, but try organizing all this while moving countries… Peta was not as lucky as she never got past first base, as getting a recent original of her South African birth certificate was just a bridge too far.
This week, after $1000 paid to lawyers to move my “file” along through the system, I went to immigration to get my residency card. There was a catch of course. I found out that the current rules require foreigners seeking residency to pay a fee that is equivalent to the price of a “return home” airline ticket. And what do we think the odds of my ever seeing or getting back the $650 I paid in cash?
No matter – I am the proud owner of a cedula — the Nicaraguan identity card. Once our last pieces of furniture are released from customs, the move to our new home base will be complete.

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